baby? no baby?

Posted by: Sarah Trost in Being Mommy, health, QF, Sovereignty of God, stillbirth/pregnancy loss Add comments

Well, they couldn’t find a baby. The cyst has grown so large it is pushing the uterus out of view of the ultrasound. They don’t know if the cyst is hiding a uterine pregnancy or if the baby is in the ovary hidden by the cyst. I have another apt on Monday. That will make my third ultrasound already but it’s supposed to be a super high level US.

Paul is having surgery today for the catheter port and will start chemo on the 12th. He will have scans about 4 weeks after he starts chemo to look for more cancer. Right now he’s still too swollen to see much (after having had surgery.)

I’m having trouble putting into words how I feel about not knowing about the baby. I think that the waiting is not good for us as a family right now because of the cancer. But at the same time, hope keeps us going and if I found out that I do indeed have an ectopic pregnancy, which is a death sentence for my baby and may require some serious medical treatment, that would be really awful.

My God is might to save. amen?!

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